Hey peeps, am finally doing some listening at Pandora. Totally cool and like perfect! While it's fun to put the ipod on shuffle, this is going to introduce me to artists I might not have known about otherwise and have me listening to tracks I've downloaded but not listened to yet.
It's my Saturday night and I'm just hanging. Thinkin' about doing some laundry and tidying up my room. We'll see. I was supposed to have a date w/B tonight but that fell through. 3/4 bummed and 1/4 relieved because now I can have a "jammie's" day. You know how I like those!
Maybe it'll be good to just listen to music and putz around tonight..haven't done that in a long while. There are too many choices of what to watch and what to read so I'm going to make a choice by not choosing either of those things to focus on (for right now anyway) and just do this.
Tomorrow is SPCO turnback shift at 5pm and then together w/Shanna afterward. We don't know what we'll be doing yet but we want it to be fun!
Rapid change of topic ahead. A subject came up recently and I needed to reflect upon it for a bit. It is something that happened to me in the past and it can happen again though I'm doing my damnedest to make sure it doesn't.
In all this hating of my job lately I've got lots of thoughts running through my head and of course I'm being scared off of even looking for something else because of all the things I read and hear about ...there being less work and then there being even more competition for those few jobs. I know I'm really good at the service part of my job but do I really want to compete with others who are as well (it galls me to think about that...let alone admit it but I know it's true) and then potentially lose?
And of course I was thinking about what would happen if I lost the job? Am I prepared for that? No, right now it feels like that if that happened then I'd have to kill myself and yeah, while there is the hate of the job right now, I would hate being unemployed even more...maybe this is a strong indicator that I need to be back in therapy. Being employed full-time is like my anchor. Without work I'd really be drifting and lost in this great big sea of life.
Now of course I'm being melodramatic. Truth is that I've survived being unemployed before and it's doable but not good for me. Actually, when was the last time I was unemployed? Actually it's been over 6 years. Good for me! I've been at the SPCO for almost 5 (next month it will be 5 years), and at the airline for over 2 years. The last year being the first year I've been doing them both (In between there was the side trip of the opera job but we're not gonna talk about that anymore are we :P) and grateful for the bounty of employment I have.
I think I know what's at the heart of the hate of being unemployed...the no income part. Duh! If that's mainly it, then that's not so bad right?
So if I were to dream about a different job what would I dream about? What are the things about my current job that I do like? What kind of other work should I look for? Still work in a call center? Nope. I don't think so. The pressure ofmaintaining stats seem to be worse in call centers. I get why they're necessary in that environment but I don't like it. (The fact of being tied to your desk and having to account for every minute -even when you have to go pee! -is why I have no interest in being a receptionist...I don't want to worry about justifying my leaving my desk!)
OK, what else? OH, I know what I was thinking about the other day...what about working in a Sky Club or something like that. Service that is the product. Brilliant! Now I just have to do some research on it. How on earth do I find out how to get a job in one. Then again, I bet they want people who look more professional and polished. (I'm not fond of professional and polished is a good look on me but it's not ME everyday. Actually, I've been paying a bit more attention to my appearance the last couple of weeks. Oh I still have my schlubby days (real weekends) but I'm wearing my nicer clothes more often, putting on earrings 1/2 the time and doing something with my hair besides a ponytail. This is Shanna's influence on me.)
I really should find out more. Wonder if I should email my manager and ask for her advice? Maybe not a smart idea to "show my hand" though...but she did tell me in our first one-on-one get together months ago that if there was another job besides reservations that I wanted, then she would help me get there. Hmm. Gonna think about this for a minute before I go shooting off an email.
Actually, I think I'm going to go do some looking around the company intranet and see if I can find anything.
>>>>
Well, that was not a complete waste of time. I am reminded of what they are but I need to find out a lot more about what it is they do and how many people they need to do it. Do they even have a phone line that a person can work, only handling Sky Club issues? From what little I know from my side of things, I think most business is just done at each location so do they have to wear uniforms like all of the other customer service positions? I wonder what exactly they do for the people that come in. Process memberships and...? I wonder what a typical day is like? What do they need to know?
I really need to get more information. I'm debating whether or not I should send an inquiring email?
I found the area where you can view available positions and I didn't see anything that was for the Sky Club. Is that because there aren't any or that's not where you go to find out about them?
I'm reeeeaaaaalllllly tempted to send the email. Email them directly...but again, I'm wondering if I really should talk to my manager first. Now, thankfully, my manager isn't really my supervisor aka can fire me. She's more like a coach. And a good one at that. With her encouragement and support, this summer before we switched over to the new system, I got my talk time down and my calls per hour up and all without sacrificing service...in fact, I had higher satisfaction scores than I thought I would!
Do I dare trust her though with this? I think I need to have a conversation with someone about this. Her or ?
I need to believe that there is a better job for me out there. In the meantime I will be grateful for the employment. Maybe even try to really stay positive about it and see if it really can get me somewhere else.
And as stated above, focus on the positive things that I enjoy about the job....be happy when I do get to say yes and give someone what they want (the few times it happens.) I totally get off on that...and figure out how to deal with all the no's I have to say.
Hmm, what else do I like about it? I like using a computer to find answers to questions. I like talking with people and really helping them feel good about their choices. I like thinking of ideas and solutions that work for challenges and problems.
&&&^^^^^*****
OK, things to be mulling over. In the meantime, life and a necessary thing to do for myself with my employer...I have to take some time this week to do the research and figure out which health plan to sign up for for 2010. I've got to decide which health plan will pale in comparison to what I got used to for the last 2 years. The great thing I had with Stay Well, Stay Working is all done. : (
Maybe that'll be what I "do" while working tomorrow night. TB shifts are incredibly easy and boring. Just answer the occasional phone call and do a 30-second transaction on the computer. Get it done.
Onward....to tidying the room and putzing.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
OMG! Best whatchamacallit EVER!
OK, so I just started watching the latest episode of "Castle" and there was the best bit EVER ...you know this show right? It stars Nathan Fillion, formerly of a little known/canceled too soon, brilliant show called "Firefly" ...suffice it to say they just TOTALLY did the coolest thing...it's so cool I gotta go find it on You Tube and put it here. For any fan of "Firefly" it's NOT to be missed!
OK, that didn't quite work...too lazy to go and find another way to get the clip...just click on this or copy/paste...it's the best 35 seconds/beginning of an episode EVER!
http://www.hulu.com/watch/104731/castle-vampire-weekend
OK, that didn't quite work...too lazy to go and find another way to get the clip...just click on this or copy/paste...it's the best 35 seconds/beginning of an episode EVER!
http://www.hulu.com/watch/104731/castle-vampire-weekend
Hmm, post it here or in the other blog? Read at your own risk.
I hate work right now and I'm wondering if I should vent here or not? Well, vent again as I've vented before or no, stop. Enough is enough. Then again this is a diary and my diaries have never not been there for me when I needed to vent.
Poor J and her honey P got an earful when I got home from work tonight because I just couldn't hold it in. J is always so polite in asking how my night was. I bet she wishes she didn't always ask! Thought that could/would be enough for tonight but nope.
Then again, I need to focus on the positive and not the negative. Let's not send me down that fucking path.
Oooh, just got sidetracked by finding the receipt w/survey instructions from earlier today when I stopped at taco bell before work (yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, but I've only had fast food 2 x's in the last week! That's a major improvement for me!) and am complaining to them ..."Today got soft taco sups w/out tomatoes, rec'd 3 soft: 1 w/only meat & cheese no sour cream or lettuce; 1/w/meat, cheese & lettuce no sour cream & 1 w/meat, sour cream, cheese & no lettuce. Thought all 4 were what soft taco sup is...am I wrong? " [only allowed 250 characters] but I think the system is set up to reject moving forward (you know, "next") when there is criticism! I swear it knows I'm trying to complain! So then it occurred to me that I'm taking my frustrations out by complaining about someone else's employer/company and I can't decide if I feel bad about it or not. Guess what? Couldn't submit with any comments after all and couldn't even finish so just forgetting about it. Whatever. I have been one of the lucky few (from what I hear) who hasn't had a drive-thru order fucked up so I guess it was just my turn. And Guess what? WE DON'T LIVE IN A PERFECT FUCKING GODDAMN WORLD.
I'm "kicking the dog" wait that doesn't sound right. I'm "kicking the cat" ...nope that doesn't sound right either...I'm "kicking the bird" ...there, that's better. There are no birds in the house. Besides what else is there after bird? You know what I"m talking about right? The Boss kicked (yelled?) at the employee, the employee kicked the spouse/wife, the wife kicked the kid, the kid kicked the dog, ...get it? The butterfly effect w/violence.
But they need to know. Will it ensure that it won't happen again? Nope, but maybe it'll happen less. (Disregard this sentence, as you saw from above my attempts to complete this were in vain but I like the sentiment so I'm leaving it in :> )
I thought playing around on delta.com the other night would help me do my job better but nope, not as much as I would have liked.
But what else is there in this economy and job market? A lot of my co-workers have their own frustrations with the job (the m-e-r-g-e-r, the r-e-m-o-d-e-l) ...one referred to is being in "golden handcuffs" and ain't that the truth!
Hey, I just summed it up beautifully to Shanna in a chat. "just a hard night. lots of apologizing to the callers and i hate to do that. there are so many things wrong now" (yup, allow myself to leave the caps "off" when chatting.) and also "that's an understatement. our working environment has changed, our systems have changed, our people have changed...."
That explains it all big-picture wise.
OK, time to breathe and re-focus on the fact that by having a job it affords me a life I enjoy. My brother is still unemployed...10 months going on 11. I don't remember the last time he was out of work this long. Though I think the last few months he hasn't even been trying to find work...he's so discouraged. And my cousin too, stuck up in Floodwood. (AKA hell [for him]) ...his dad laid down the law..either he go to meetings with them or he can't live there. Fucking A! My cousin is over 40 years old for fuck's sake. While I respect the fact that he feels that way, it's also seriously fucked up. But where else can he go?
Breathe Sam, breathe.
Thank goodness I have some jelly belly jelly beans to munch ( ;) ) on. (Preceded by a golden delicious apple, apple fritter bread w/cream cheese and cheddar pita chips)
Now maybe time for some escapism. Last nights TV was encore night for everything but "Castle" and if ever there was a light and fluffy, pure entertainment show to watch it's that one.
Oh! And speaking of TV, what does that say about my taste in TV right now that I haven't been in any hurry whatsoever to watch the new season of "Nip/Tuck" that began a couple of weeks ago?
Later.
Poor J and her honey P got an earful when I got home from work tonight because I just couldn't hold it in. J is always so polite in asking how my night was. I bet she wishes she didn't always ask! Thought that could/would be enough for tonight but nope.
Then again, I need to focus on the positive and not the negative. Let's not send me down that fucking path.
Oooh, just got sidetracked by finding the receipt w/survey instructions from earlier today when I stopped at taco bell before work (yeah, yeah, yeah, I know, but I've only had fast food 2 x's in the last week! That's a major improvement for me!) and am complaining to them ..."Today got soft taco sups w/out tomatoes, rec'd 3 soft: 1 w/only meat & cheese no sour cream or lettuce; 1/w/meat, cheese & lettuce no sour cream & 1 w/meat, sour cream, cheese & no lettuce. Thought all 4 were what soft taco sup is...am I wrong? " [only allowed 250 characters] but I think the system is set up to reject moving forward (you know, "next") when there is criticism! I swear it knows I'm trying to complain! So then it occurred to me that I'm taking my frustrations out by complaining about someone else's employer/company and I can't decide if I feel bad about it or not. Guess what? Couldn't submit with any comments after all and couldn't even finish so just forgetting about it. Whatever. I have been one of the lucky few (from what I hear) who hasn't had a drive-thru order fucked up so I guess it was just my turn. And Guess what? WE DON'T LIVE IN A PERFECT FUCKING GODDAMN WORLD.
I'm "kicking the dog" wait that doesn't sound right. I'm "kicking the cat" ...nope that doesn't sound right either...I'm "kicking the bird" ...there, that's better. There are no birds in the house. Besides what else is there after bird? You know what I"m talking about right? The Boss kicked (yelled?) at the employee, the employee kicked the spouse/wife, the wife kicked the kid, the kid kicked the dog, ...get it? The butterfly effect w/violence.
But they need to know. Will it ensure that it won't happen again? Nope, but maybe it'll happen less. (Disregard this sentence, as you saw from above my attempts to complete this were in vain but I like the sentiment so I'm leaving it in :> )
I thought playing around on delta.com the other night would help me do my job better but nope, not as much as I would have liked.
But what else is there in this economy and job market? A lot of my co-workers have their own frustrations with the job (the m-e-r-g-e-r, the r-e-m-o-d-e-l) ...one referred to is being in "golden handcuffs" and ain't that the truth!
Hey, I just summed it up beautifully to Shanna in a chat. "just a hard night. lots of apologizing to the callers and i hate to do that. there are so many things wrong now" (yup, allow myself to leave the caps "off" when chatting.) and also "that's an understatement. our working environment has changed, our systems have changed, our people have changed...."
That explains it all big-picture wise.
OK, time to breathe and re-focus on the fact that by having a job it affords me a life I enjoy. My brother is still unemployed...10 months going on 11. I don't remember the last time he was out of work this long. Though I think the last few months he hasn't even been trying to find work...he's so discouraged. And my cousin too, stuck up in Floodwood. (AKA hell [for him]) ...his dad laid down the law..either he go to meetings with them or he can't live there. Fucking A! My cousin is over 40 years old for fuck's sake. While I respect the fact that he feels that way, it's also seriously fucked up. But where else can he go?
Breathe Sam, breathe.
Thank goodness I have some jelly belly jelly beans to munch ( ;) ) on. (Preceded by a golden delicious apple, apple fritter bread w/cream cheese and cheddar pita chips)
Now maybe time for some escapism. Last nights TV was encore night for everything but "Castle" and if ever there was a light and fluffy, pure entertainment show to watch it's that one.
Oh! And speaking of TV, what does that say about my taste in TV right now that I haven't been in any hurry whatsoever to watch the new season of "Nip/Tuck" that began a couple of weeks ago?
Later.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
The drapes match the carpet...but the duvet cover doesn't quite match the sheets
After reading the horoscope from last week, I decided to focus on the sweet, real things that are already a part of my relationship with B. He does nice things for me all the time and I need to appreciate them more. (And of course vice versa!)
============
OK, so I'm kind of weird, but I only have one set of sheets for my bed these days. Sadly (though also secretly glad because it's fun getting new bed linens!), I recently had to replace the current set. But I'm thinking it maybe wasn't the most brilliant idea to pick a color that won't show the cat hair, brown. I'll just have to add a reminder to my calendar to frequently remind me to "de-fur" it. :P I love my boy but there is too much goddamn hair! Gave him a good brushing tonight so that should help for a day or so. I decided to pick up a comforter cover as well because they were on sale and I figured it would be easier to wash than the comforter...the shades of brown between the sheets and the cover don't quite match but close enough...
&&&&&&&
It was a lovely weekend. Spent time with B and Ryan. Thursday was about sleepin' in and being lazy until it was time for my date w/B. He took me to a nice place, Caffe Biaggio in St. Paul. (Who knew that there was a nice restaurant on University Ave/St. Paul!?) I had a glass of Prosecco and a yummy entree that was actually an appetizer of a homemade sausage pizza. I feel a bit dumb for having had the pizza as my entree but everything else on the menu was not quite what this fussy-but-trying-not-to-be fussy eater would eat. B had flank steak and polenta. (Yeah, there was that and a couple of other things I could have ordered like spaghetti, etc. but the pizza was a safe bet) I sampled his polenta and steak though...I wanted to try the polenta because it's been prepared a lot on all these cooking shows that I've been watching like "Top Chef" and I've been wondering what exactly it was and how it tasted ...my verdict? It was OK. Now the steak on the other hand was truly delicious....so tender and juicy....but hey you know, the polenta wasn't the only thing I've tried recently...when I was at Hell's Kitchen w/Shanna last week (or was it week before?) I actually tried asparagus. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but again, like polenta, not quite my cup of tea. I'm trying! Slowly but surely my palate will evolve beyond where it's at now...
Anyhoo, my pizza was "gourmet" so I am going to stop feeling bad about it. Fresh and light w/homemade italian sausage.
It was nice to be on a date. We've had a lot of breakfast dates lately and while that's fine, woman can not live on breakfast alone!
Then Friday, PAYDAY! Ran some errands, worked a turnback shift for the SPCO and then got to catch up with Ryan. But before I talk about how fun that was, let me vent a little about how much I hate dealing with parking in downtown St. Paul (uh, repeat much?) ...I'm seriously considering telling them to schedule me for concerts, outside of downtown St. Paul or I'm done. Is that overly dramatic? I'm just so spoiled by having a car and having free parking wherever else I go. The inconvenience of driving around hoping for a free meter and then not finding one and having to just settle for the closest place (since I'm usually running late by then) and pay $10 to park for 3-3 1/2 hours is insane!
I'm getting spoiled by the things in my life that aren't challenging.
(When I was hanging out w/Shanna last week we talked about public transportation. We both have a ton of experience on it. The thought came up that it might be a good idea if I experienced the use of public transportation from here to work someday so I'd know what it was like, in case Suzette had to go away for a while (e.g. mechanic) ...I don't relish the thought, but it makes sense. Or maybe I'll just wait until I have no other choice. :P I'm just thankful I've had Suzette the last couple of years but know it can change anytime.)
Anyhoo, back to time w/Ryan. We had a nice cocktail or two and some liquid crack ...no, no, just a yummy mixture of tomatoes, cream cheese and smoked sausage (did I get that right R?) and did some catching up and then we watched "Frequency". It came out about 10 years ago but I never really wanted to see it. Big mistake. It was really good.
Now, back to the work week and life as I know it.
< Sigh >
============
OK, so I'm kind of weird, but I only have one set of sheets for my bed these days. Sadly (though also secretly glad because it's fun getting new bed linens!), I recently had to replace the current set. But I'm thinking it maybe wasn't the most brilliant idea to pick a color that won't show the cat hair, brown. I'll just have to add a reminder to my calendar to frequently remind me to "de-fur" it. :P I love my boy but there is too much goddamn hair! Gave him a good brushing tonight so that should help for a day or so. I decided to pick up a comforter cover as well because they were on sale and I figured it would be easier to wash than the comforter...the shades of brown between the sheets and the cover don't quite match but close enough...
&&&&&&&
It was a lovely weekend. Spent time with B and Ryan. Thursday was about sleepin' in and being lazy until it was time for my date w/B. He took me to a nice place, Caffe Biaggio in St. Paul. (Who knew that there was a nice restaurant on University Ave/St. Paul!?) I had a glass of Prosecco and a yummy entree that was actually an appetizer of a homemade sausage pizza. I feel a bit dumb for having had the pizza as my entree but everything else on the menu was not quite what this fussy-but-trying-not-to-be fussy eater would eat. B had flank steak and polenta. (Yeah, there was that and a couple of other things I could have ordered like spaghetti, etc. but the pizza was a safe bet) I sampled his polenta and steak though...I wanted to try the polenta because it's been prepared a lot on all these cooking shows that I've been watching like "Top Chef" and I've been wondering what exactly it was and how it tasted ...my verdict? It was OK. Now the steak on the other hand was truly delicious....so tender and juicy....but hey you know, the polenta wasn't the only thing I've tried recently...when I was at Hell's Kitchen w/Shanna last week (or was it week before?) I actually tried asparagus. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but again, like polenta, not quite my cup of tea. I'm trying! Slowly but surely my palate will evolve beyond where it's at now...
Anyhoo, my pizza was "gourmet" so I am going to stop feeling bad about it. Fresh and light w/homemade italian sausage.
It was nice to be on a date. We've had a lot of breakfast dates lately and while that's fine, woman can not live on breakfast alone!
Then Friday, PAYDAY! Ran some errands, worked a turnback shift for the SPCO and then got to catch up with Ryan. But before I talk about how fun that was, let me vent a little about how much I hate dealing with parking in downtown St. Paul (uh, repeat much?) ...I'm seriously considering telling them to schedule me for concerts, outside of downtown St. Paul or I'm done. Is that overly dramatic? I'm just so spoiled by having a car and having free parking wherever else I go. The inconvenience of driving around hoping for a free meter and then not finding one and having to just settle for the closest place (since I'm usually running late by then) and pay $10 to park for 3-3 1/2 hours is insane!
I'm getting spoiled by the things in my life that aren't challenging.
(When I was hanging out w/Shanna last week we talked about public transportation. We both have a ton of experience on it. The thought came up that it might be a good idea if I experienced the use of public transportation from here to work someday so I'd know what it was like, in case Suzette had to go away for a while (e.g. mechanic) ...I don't relish the thought, but it makes sense. Or maybe I'll just wait until I have no other choice. :P I'm just thankful I've had Suzette the last couple of years but know it can change anytime.)
Anyhoo, back to time w/Ryan. We had a nice cocktail or two and some liquid crack ...no, no, just a yummy mixture of tomatoes, cream cheese and smoked sausage (did I get that right R?) and did some catching up and then we watched "Frequency". It came out about 10 years ago but I never really wanted to see it. Big mistake. It was really good.
Now, back to the work week and life as I know it.
< Sigh >
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Oooh, this is right on the money!
Leo (July 23–Aug. 22)
You're sometimes subject to what I call Movie Mentality. That is, you want things to play out something like the way they'd happen in a movie. You want to be swept off your feet in a whirlwind romance, or be the hero of your own adventure—or at least the main character in it. This is all due to your romantic nature, and, yes, your big ego. However, rarely does life reflect the movies. Trying to make it look that way often makes people feel weird and uncomfortable, especially when they'd rather it just be what it is, and real. Try to see the beauty, poetry, and drama in that, even if it's not as spectacular as what you'd see on the silver screen.
(From Seattle Weekly/Sign Language)
From all the romances I've read and the romantic movies I've watched how can I but help but want my own romantic reality to be as exciting as what I've read or seen. Is that really so wrong?
Something to ponder. I do concede it never hurts to just live in the now and enjoy the real, true romantic moments I do get/have. And I get plenty. B is such a patient, loving man w/me. He makes me feel like a sexy goddess and that is wonderful in and of itself.
You're sometimes subject to what I call Movie Mentality. That is, you want things to play out something like the way they'd happen in a movie. You want to be swept off your feet in a whirlwind romance, or be the hero of your own adventure—or at least the main character in it. This is all due to your romantic nature, and, yes, your big ego. However, rarely does life reflect the movies. Trying to make it look that way often makes people feel weird and uncomfortable, especially when they'd rather it just be what it is, and real. Try to see the beauty, poetry, and drama in that, even if it's not as spectacular as what you'd see on the silver screen.
(From Seattle Weekly/Sign Language)
From all the romances I've read and the romantic movies I've watched how can I but help but want my own romantic reality to be as exciting as what I've read or seen. Is that really so wrong?
Something to ponder. I do concede it never hurts to just live in the now and enjoy the real, true romantic moments I do get/have. And I get plenty. B is such a patient, loving man w/me. He makes me feel like a sexy goddess and that is wonderful in and of itself.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Happy Happy B-day J!
I hope you had a wonderful day (even if you weren't necessarily looking forward to it :) )
I hope it doesn't seem weird to post this, but we've gotten to know each other a little better over the past couple of weeks AND You're the reason I started doing the blog thing in the first place (the latter is reason enough to do this! :P ) Having this blog is such a cool thing in my life...I desperately needed an outlet for my inner drama queen/wannabe writer.
Did I ever tell you how I found your blog? Oh, I think I did once...I wanted to know more about you...the mysterious yet warm and friendly woman who would be housing me.
So I Googled you. (I love Google but I wonder if Bing is all that and a bag of chips. Anyone? Anyone?)
I didn't know what a blog was. I'd heard of them of course, knew that at one point they were all the rage (but like with most things in my life, I came late to that party i.e. sex, drugs, cell phones, etc.) but I had no idea how wonderful they were.
I've told you this already but I really do appreciate how you've made me feel at home here.
I was hesitant and excited both when it came time for me to decide to move out of my last place. I liked your ad immediately and when I came to see the place, your energy was infectious (and the price was right!) so here I am. Over a year later. I really didn't think I would be here that long as I was still in moving-to-London-at-some-point-sooner-rather-than-later mode.
I appreciate having a place to live while I figure my shit out (and someone who can tolerate the fact that I HATE HATE doing dishes...you and Shanna should talk since you've both had the distinct pleasure of living with me :> )
I live in a home with loving people and animals and know I'm pretty lucky. So thanks again.
Sam.
P.S. You told me I didn't have to get you anything for your birthday but I'm going to only partially listen. I actually have a card for you as well, but that will be filled w/mushy stuff. I hope you like it. It made me think of you the minute I read it. Not that you're mushy...
I hope it doesn't seem weird to post this, but we've gotten to know each other a little better over the past couple of weeks AND You're the reason I started doing the blog thing in the first place (the latter is reason enough to do this! :P ) Having this blog is such a cool thing in my life...I desperately needed an outlet for my inner drama queen/wannabe writer.
Did I ever tell you how I found your blog? Oh, I think I did once...I wanted to know more about you...the mysterious yet warm and friendly woman who would be housing me.
So I Googled you. (I love Google but I wonder if Bing is all that and a bag of chips. Anyone? Anyone?)
I didn't know what a blog was. I'd heard of them of course, knew that at one point they were all the rage (but like with most things in my life, I came late to that party i.e. sex, drugs, cell phones, etc.) but I had no idea how wonderful they were.
I've told you this already but I really do appreciate how you've made me feel at home here.
I was hesitant and excited both when it came time for me to decide to move out of my last place. I liked your ad immediately and when I came to see the place, your energy was infectious (and the price was right!) so here I am. Over a year later. I really didn't think I would be here that long as I was still in moving-to-London-at-some-point-sooner-rather-than-later mode.
I appreciate having a place to live while I figure my shit out (and someone who can tolerate the fact that I HATE HATE doing dishes...you and Shanna should talk since you've both had the distinct pleasure of living with me :> )
I live in a home with loving people and animals and know I'm pretty lucky. So thanks again.
Sam.
P.S. You told me I didn't have to get you anything for your birthday but I'm going to only partially listen. I actually have a card for you as well, but that will be filled w/mushy stuff. I hope you like it. It made me think of you the minute I read it. Not that you're mushy...
Duh! or if you prefer, Doh!
So I mentioned that one of the necessary things for me to have at work (in order for me to work without having major neck pain) is that I just have to move the monitor close enough to see it w/out craning my neck forward
=
Changing the size of the font here in Firefox to be much BIGGER so that I can see it better w/out craning my neck forward.
>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<
So do you know cool I think it is whenever somebody tells me that they read my blog? It seems like such a self-indulgent thing to be doing but I'm loving it. My Leo side is basking in the glow...
Oh! I'll come back to this later. Going to do a separate post in honor of J's b-day since I decided back in August to dedicate a post to those special people in my life.
=
Changing the size of the font here in Firefox to be much BIGGER so that I can see it better w/out craning my neck forward.
>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<
So do you know cool I think it is whenever somebody tells me that they read my blog? It seems like such a self-indulgent thing to be doing but I'm loving it. My Leo side is basking in the glow...
Oh! I'll come back to this later. Going to do a separate post in honor of J's b-day since I decided back in August to dedicate a post to those special people in my life.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
Cranky Sam is not a pretty sight
I had a wee tantrum today after arriving at work and finding out that the computer on the desk I was going to sit at was still logged into someone else's login (who had left for the day) so I had to scramble to find somewhere else to sit and fast when I didn't really have the time or the patience to deal with it.
See the thing is, we're not allowed to "nest" at work (even though of course people still do it) and there are too many people, on too many different types of shifts and not enough stations so there a few of us who live like nomads, dragging our crap around (we are getting lockers, but again, just like the desks, we'll have to share) For the record, I'm not opposed to nesting, before we had our "remodel" I had a nest/desk I could sit at everyday w/out worry it wouldn't be set up for me when I got there and I just really miss having a regular spot..there have been so many fucking changes with this merger and enough is enough! To further explain why this is a big deal, a couple of months ago I finally did something about making sure I was working ergonomically and it's made a world of difference to me physically (mainly my neck!) so I need my work area set-up a certain way in order to work comfortably. But since the remodel, each and every time I come into work and go the desk I set up the day before, it's taken or unavailable and I have to start all over again and it's driving me fucking nuts. (To make matters worse, we also can't eat even snacks on the floor (OK, admittedly, this one is better for our health!) and our beverages must be in spill proof cups. No plants allowed either...and don't even get me started on how we're packed in like sardines while other departments that don't talk to people on the phone at all have spaces to work in that are bigger than what we've got!)
Well, today I snapped. I'm sure our visitors from Atlanta (they were around when this happened) must think I'm a total bitch but this is fucking ridiculous!
Now of course, I take some responsibility because I could have remembered that I would have to take a different way to work this weekend (due to the fucking construction on 35W/62 Crosstown) but I didn't, so therefore, I couldn't stop at Target to pick up the pita chips/hummus & chicken salad that I was especially looking forward to having for lunch/dinner tonight, (instead, had to take the long way, which meant stopping at SA for lunch/dinner because they were on the way and the quickest to get in and out of) and so then I was running later than planned... all that and then not only could I not flex, I also didn't have those few minutes before the start of shift to get myself situated. (The man yelled at his wife, who yelled at the kid, who yelled at the dog, who yelled at the cat, who yelled at the bird...it's the butterfly effect baby!) And it was the final straw. It's been so aggravating that I've been thinking of talking to my manager about either helping me find a station that I can claim needs to be mine and stay the way it is for medical reasons or putting up notes and trying to organize some sort of schedule or system so that I can find a regular place and if I share it, so be it, but it'll be the same fucking spot I can go to every day!
I'm so fucking spoiled. When things don't go my way, I'm an absolute and total bitch. (How do you people stand me? :P ) But it's not so wrong to just want to spend your 8 hours a day/40 hours a week in a place that's comfortable for you is it? Didn't think so.
Or am I so cranky because even though I had a fantastic time w/Shanna yesterday, starting with yummy food at Hell's Kitchen downtown, Rosedale Mall sucks eggs....very few places had women's sizes (Lane Bryant moved out! JJill only carries women's sizes in the catalog!) and the one shoe store that was full of ugly-so-they-should-have-them-in-my-size didn't carry my size...which was especially disappointing once I started getting excited about a particular shoe that was actually cute! I was in a world where there was no place for a person of my size. Neither body, nor booby, nor foot. (Ah, yes, this is why I rarely go out shopping and do most of it online these days)
Oh poor Sam, you know it wasn't all bad...being there brought to mind something quite significant (but in a good way)...Shanna heard this yesterday but as this blog is a recording of my life for me to look back upon someday, I shall repeat it for history's sake... I worked at that mall back in '91 and I was selling shoes for a place called "The Cobbie Shop". (In that same location today is the shoe store I went into that I talk about above)-and that is the place I actually met B for the first time. He had just started dating the woman who the assistant manager of the shoe store, J. He came in to the store one night to pick her up for a date and that's how we met. I thought he was a nice guy but soooo not my type. (I was into the... effeminate type at that time of my life) (And coincidentally just the other day he told me that when he met me back then that he thought I was cute (as in attractive!) A few months later, I left the world of shoes behind and began my career in arts ticketing. It would take another 4 years before I would meet B again and when I did WHAM! There were fireworks, alarms, heat, smoke and my blood boiled...all when he came up to me and hugged me (I thought it was cool that he remembered me...little did I know that he thought I was sexy so of course he remembered me!) In those four years, I had become attracted to a new kind of man...and this time around it was with a manly man with muscles and facial hair! ...and the rest is history.
So with that, Rosedale wasn't a total failure...I got to think about meeting B, my own years of working in retail (prior to shoes, it was men's clothes) and how my life was back then. I also didn't walk out empty handed...I found a cute pair of earrings (Shanna and I went in on a buy one, get one 1/2 off deal at Express) and at Sephora, I picked up a tinted lip balm and a small thing of perfume. We also hit up "target boutique" on the way back to Minneapolis and I got the first pair of slippers I'll have for this winter.
I should feel guilty for shopping but I paid bills and I just felt like I needed to live a little and so I did. Being out and about was fun (though physically I'm a wreck...I'm so out of shape it's ridiculous, Shanna deserves a freakin' medal for her patience! All of my friends do when we go out!...and yeah, I'm gonna get right on that! :P)
---
So it was a long day. The people who were calling got a taste of less-than-perky Sam and I'm sure what I was "giving" was why I got what I got. There was no smile in my voice. :(
I feel much calmer now...I'm home and have unclenched by watching the latest episodes of "Fringe" and "Flash Forward" (have I mentioned the latter is TV crack?) ...I'll save "Supernatural" and "Bones" for tomorrow night. Nothing like a little escapism to cheer a gal up.
So it's almost 4am and I guess I should think about calling it a day. So OK.
See the thing is, we're not allowed to "nest" at work (even though of course people still do it) and there are too many people, on too many different types of shifts and not enough stations so there a few of us who live like nomads, dragging our crap around (we are getting lockers, but again, just like the desks, we'll have to share) For the record, I'm not opposed to nesting, before we had our "remodel" I had a nest/desk I could sit at everyday w/out worry it wouldn't be set up for me when I got there and I just really miss having a regular spot..there have been so many fucking changes with this merger and enough is enough! To further explain why this is a big deal, a couple of months ago I finally did something about making sure I was working ergonomically and it's made a world of difference to me physically (mainly my neck!) so I need my work area set-up a certain way in order to work comfortably. But since the remodel, each and every time I come into work and go the desk I set up the day before, it's taken or unavailable and I have to start all over again and it's driving me fucking nuts. (To make matters worse, we also can't eat even snacks on the floor (OK, admittedly, this one is better for our health!) and our beverages must be in spill proof cups. No plants allowed either...and don't even get me started on how we're packed in like sardines while other departments that don't talk to people on the phone at all have spaces to work in that are bigger than what we've got!)
Well, today I snapped. I'm sure our visitors from Atlanta (they were around when this happened) must think I'm a total bitch but this is fucking ridiculous!
Now of course, I take some responsibility because I could have remembered that I would have to take a different way to work this weekend (due to the fucking construction on 35W/62 Crosstown) but I didn't, so therefore, I couldn't stop at Target to pick up the pita chips/hummus & chicken salad that I was especially looking forward to having for lunch/dinner tonight, (instead, had to take the long way, which meant stopping at SA for lunch/dinner because they were on the way and the quickest to get in and out of) and so then I was running later than planned... all that and then not only could I not flex, I also didn't have those few minutes before the start of shift to get myself situated. (The man yelled at his wife, who yelled at the kid, who yelled at the dog, who yelled at the cat, who yelled at the bird...it's the butterfly effect baby!) And it was the final straw. It's been so aggravating that I've been thinking of talking to my manager about either helping me find a station that I can claim needs to be mine and stay the way it is for medical reasons or putting up notes and trying to organize some sort of schedule or system so that I can find a regular place and if I share it, so be it, but it'll be the same fucking spot I can go to every day!
I'm so fucking spoiled. When things don't go my way, I'm an absolute and total bitch. (How do you people stand me? :P ) But it's not so wrong to just want to spend your 8 hours a day/40 hours a week in a place that's comfortable for you is it? Didn't think so.
Or am I so cranky because even though I had a fantastic time w/Shanna yesterday, starting with yummy food at Hell's Kitchen downtown, Rosedale Mall sucks eggs....very few places had women's sizes (Lane Bryant moved out! JJill only carries women's sizes in the catalog!) and the one shoe store that was full of ugly-so-they-should-have-them-in-my-size didn't carry my size...which was especially disappointing once I started getting excited about a particular shoe that was actually cute! I was in a world where there was no place for a person of my size. Neither body, nor booby, nor foot. (Ah, yes, this is why I rarely go out shopping and do most of it online these days)
Oh poor Sam, you know it wasn't all bad...being there brought to mind something quite significant (but in a good way)...Shanna heard this yesterday but as this blog is a recording of my life for me to look back upon someday, I shall repeat it for history's sake... I worked at that mall back in '91 and I was selling shoes for a place called "The Cobbie Shop". (In that same location today is the shoe store I went into that I talk about above)-and that is the place I actually met B for the first time. He had just started dating the woman who the assistant manager of the shoe store, J. He came in to the store one night to pick her up for a date and that's how we met. I thought he was a nice guy but soooo not my type. (I was into the... effeminate type at that time of my life) (And coincidentally just the other day he told me that when he met me back then that he thought I was cute (as in attractive!) A few months later, I left the world of shoes behind and began my career in arts ticketing. It would take another 4 years before I would meet B again and when I did WHAM! There were fireworks, alarms, heat, smoke and my blood boiled...all when he came up to me and hugged me (I thought it was cool that he remembered me...little did I know that he thought I was sexy so of course he remembered me!) In those four years, I had become attracted to a new kind of man...and this time around it was with a manly man with muscles and facial hair! ...and the rest is history.
So with that, Rosedale wasn't a total failure...I got to think about meeting B, my own years of working in retail (prior to shoes, it was men's clothes) and how my life was back then. I also didn't walk out empty handed...I found a cute pair of earrings (Shanna and I went in on a buy one, get one 1/2 off deal at Express) and at Sephora, I picked up a tinted lip balm and a small thing of perfume. We also hit up "target boutique" on the way back to Minneapolis and I got the first pair of slippers I'll have for this winter.
I should feel guilty for shopping but I paid bills and I just felt like I needed to live a little and so I did. Being out and about was fun (though physically I'm a wreck...I'm so out of shape it's ridiculous, Shanna deserves a freakin' medal for her patience! All of my friends do when we go out!...and yeah, I'm gonna get right on that! :P)
---
So it was a long day. The people who were calling got a taste of less-than-perky Sam and I'm sure what I was "giving" was why I got what I got. There was no smile in my voice. :(
I feel much calmer now...I'm home and have unclenched by watching the latest episodes of "Fringe" and "Flash Forward" (have I mentioned the latter is TV crack?) ...I'll save "Supernatural" and "Bones" for tomorrow night. Nothing like a little escapism to cheer a gal up.
So it's almost 4am and I guess I should think about calling it a day. So OK.
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Hey body, how YOU doin'?
So I'm definitely going to be watching out for the new season of "Drop Dead Diva" sometime next year. I just finished watching the season 1 season finale and Wowza! Can't wait to see what happens next season.
----
I'm going to start spending some time looking up recipes and/or ideas for more healthy things to cook/prepare, with an eye toward figuring out how to keep them fast and easy because I'm just [stubbornly] not wanting to give up any of my precious sleep time prior to work.
See, I've developed a bad habit of not preparing any "breakfast" at home before I leave for work and have instead been stopping for food and of course, most of the time, it's by zipping through a drive-thru of some kind. Now of course, yes, I can make healthier selections at these places ("Eat This, Not That" actually had great advice for fast food junkies like me ..e.g. at BK, a Whopper Jr. (w/out the mayo) a small order of onion rings and a diet soda...yes! Really!) but I usually just say screw it and NOT order that. I could be smarter and do the Subway thing but only if I make the time to actually stop, park and go in. Or hell, I could even go the route of a co-worker and have a bowl of Special K in the a.m., Chipotle burrito bowl for mid-day meal and Special K again at night and then lose a bunch of weight! NOT! (OK, yeah, a teesny weensy bit tempted but I think I'd get bored with that after a couple of days and there isn't a Chipotle right on my way to work...I'd have to detour! Oh I know, poor Sam! Yes, I'd like a nice Gouda to go with that whine :P)
At the same time, I'm sick of fast food in general. Oh, sure I'll keep eating it (who are we kidding???) but I have to do better. (Recent observation is that when I'm low on funds and having to make do with groceries and preparing more meals for myself, I eat less crap/junk.)
Or maybe I should just get my tired, lazy butt out of bed and start adding some discipline to my life. I should get up, have a good, healthy breakfast, make coffee and then off to work. (Why not throw in a yoga'ish workout/stretch session while I'm at it? :P )
I'm so spoiled by my freedom to do what I want, when I want and NOT do anything I don't want to (uh, besides go to work! :> ) that it feels....wrong? No, it feels sooooo right. I spent most of my adolescence and young adult life being told what to do (like most kids) from having to do chores (dishes, taking turns w/my brother cooking dinner, vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the kitchen, taking the garbage out, clean my room, etc.), going to school AND working on days that we didn't have meetings, preparing for and going to those meetings 3 x's a week...(geez, no wonder I was so bloody tired as a teenager!)
Maybe all of this is a roundabout way of saying I like my life (mostly) but that I can make it a better life by focusing on getting a bit healthier. I've been out-of-control and not caring and it's about time to get back on track and pay some attention to me physically.
I wonder if giving up some of the things I enjoy that ARE bad for me would be a good enough compromise so that I could keep drinking the nectar of the gods, Mountain Dew?
---
Speaking of health...It's soon open enrollment time at work for health benefits for 2010 and I've got a LOT of information to read. I'm going to have to pick a plan if I want to continue to get my "happy" pills. I'm not looking forward to whatever choice I'll end up making because nothing will compare to the wonderful health insurance I've had for the past couple of years.
I was lucky enough to get into a program called Stay Well, Stay Working that was a pilot project created to study what would happen for people who had a history of depression and losing jobs when they had full resources to help them maintain their physical, mental AND emotional help so that they could continue working.
We had a "navigator" to check in with and have as a resource for things we needed help with. There was also a survey to fill out annually.
I will hope that after they look at all of the data and results from this project that they find a way to have this as a permanent program for those who need it. Even if I never have it again, it was such a gift and I know played a part in helping me stay focused on being employed FULL-TIME, at one place, for the past 2 years (and even though I've had some rough spots, I still have a job!) I know others would benefit from this type of thing.
Now I just have to pick a new health plan that is the best plan for me and hope I make the right choice.
On that note, let's make a good decision for me and put myself to bed. Ciao.
----
I'm going to start spending some time looking up recipes and/or ideas for more healthy things to cook/prepare, with an eye toward figuring out how to keep them fast and easy because I'm just [stubbornly] not wanting to give up any of my precious sleep time prior to work.
See, I've developed a bad habit of not preparing any "breakfast" at home before I leave for work and have instead been stopping for food and of course, most of the time, it's by zipping through a drive-thru of some kind. Now of course, yes, I can make healthier selections at these places ("Eat This, Not That" actually had great advice for fast food junkies like me ..e.g. at BK, a Whopper Jr. (w/out the mayo) a small order of onion rings and a diet soda...yes! Really!) but I usually just say screw it and NOT order that. I could be smarter and do the Subway thing but only if I make the time to actually stop, park and go in. Or hell, I could even go the route of a co-worker and have a bowl of Special K in the a.m., Chipotle burrito bowl for mid-day meal and Special K again at night and then lose a bunch of weight! NOT! (OK, yeah, a teesny weensy bit tempted but I think I'd get bored with that after a couple of days and there isn't a Chipotle right on my way to work...I'd have to detour! Oh I know, poor Sam! Yes, I'd like a nice Gouda to go with that whine :P)
At the same time, I'm sick of fast food in general. Oh, sure I'll keep eating it (who are we kidding???) but I have to do better. (Recent observation is that when I'm low on funds and having to make do with groceries and preparing more meals for myself, I eat less crap/junk.)
Or maybe I should just get my tired, lazy butt out of bed and start adding some discipline to my life. I should get up, have a good, healthy breakfast, make coffee and then off to work. (Why not throw in a yoga'ish workout/stretch session while I'm at it? :P )
I'm so spoiled by my freedom to do what I want, when I want and NOT do anything I don't want to (uh, besides go to work! :> ) that it feels....wrong? No, it feels sooooo right. I spent most of my adolescence and young adult life being told what to do (like most kids) from having to do chores (dishes, taking turns w/my brother cooking dinner, vacuuming, laundry, cleaning the kitchen, taking the garbage out, clean my room, etc.), going to school AND working on days that we didn't have meetings, preparing for and going to those meetings 3 x's a week...(geez, no wonder I was so bloody tired as a teenager!)
Maybe all of this is a roundabout way of saying I like my life (mostly) but that I can make it a better life by focusing on getting a bit healthier. I've been out-of-control and not caring and it's about time to get back on track and pay some attention to me physically.
I wonder if giving up some of the things I enjoy that ARE bad for me would be a good enough compromise so that I could keep drinking the nectar of the gods, Mountain Dew?
---
Speaking of health...It's soon open enrollment time at work for health benefits for 2010 and I've got a LOT of information to read. I'm going to have to pick a plan if I want to continue to get my "happy" pills. I'm not looking forward to whatever choice I'll end up making because nothing will compare to the wonderful health insurance I've had for the past couple of years.
I was lucky enough to get into a program called Stay Well, Stay Working that was a pilot project created to study what would happen for people who had a history of depression and losing jobs when they had full resources to help them maintain their physical, mental AND emotional help so that they could continue working.
We had a "navigator" to check in with and have as a resource for things we needed help with. There was also a survey to fill out annually.
I will hope that after they look at all of the data and results from this project that they find a way to have this as a permanent program for those who need it. Even if I never have it again, it was such a gift and I know played a part in helping me stay focused on being employed FULL-TIME, at one place, for the past 2 years (and even though I've had some rough spots, I still have a job!) I know others would benefit from this type of thing.
Now I just have to pick a new health plan that is the best plan for me and hope I make the right choice.
On that note, let's make a good decision for me and put myself to bed. Ciao.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Tra la la
Happy Hump Day (it's my Wednesday) ..only 2 more days to go 'til I'm off again.
I have a new appreciation for a 5-day work week after that 8 day stretch I did last week.
So the other night I found myself giving "Flash Forward" a watch and dammit, I'm addicted! Great, that's all I need..another show that is a "must-see" every damn week.
Not much else to chat about right now. Am tired and will try to crash earlier because I've got to get up for "breakfast". ;) AND I have been staying up too bloody late the last few nights.
I just get sucked into a book and can't put the damn thing down. Oooh, that reminds me, I've got to add some more authors to my "Must-Read" author list. So now I've just added Patrica Briggs, Rachel Caine and P.N. Elrod. Elrod I've been reading for a couple of years now. The other 2 I've recently "discovered" and am now either caught up with the series or will be shortly.
There sometimes is nothing better than snuggling under the comforter with a good book.
So have you noticed I took the yummy man pictures down? Will you miss them? I think I just felt like ..'eh, I'm not a silly teenage girl ...just a silly almost 40 year old and there are probably other cool ways I can express my love for beautiful things. Or maybe I'll change my mind and add 'em back at some point. Or maybe I'll find some other cool or interesting things to add here.
So yeah, it's a cold night here in the city. That big snow we had today was a kick in the pants. Fucking winter. I'm just glad it was all melted by the time I left work. I HATE HATE driving in snow. I'm one of those drivers who piss the rest of you off because I'm going, like, 30 miles an hour on the freeway when the weather is bad and you wish I'd hurry the hell up or get out of your way.
I've just had my share of accidents (not all of them my fault...I think) thank you very much and would not care for any more.
Speaking of driving...it will be 10 years that I've had my license this December.
Yeah, I got my license when I was 29. It's a long story that I won't bore you with, suffice it to say, it just was finally the right time and my parent's were willing to let me have their 1973 Ford LTD. A perfect car for a person's first car wouldn't you say?
Welp, gonna wind this down and then wind me down.
Later.
I have a new appreciation for a 5-day work week after that 8 day stretch I did last week.
So the other night I found myself giving "Flash Forward" a watch and dammit, I'm addicted! Great, that's all I need..another show that is a "must-see" every damn week.
Not much else to chat about right now. Am tired and will try to crash earlier because I've got to get up for "breakfast". ;) AND I have been staying up too bloody late the last few nights.
I just get sucked into a book and can't put the damn thing down. Oooh, that reminds me, I've got to add some more authors to my "Must-Read" author list. So now I've just added Patrica Briggs, Rachel Caine and P.N. Elrod. Elrod I've been reading for a couple of years now. The other 2 I've recently "discovered" and am now either caught up with the series or will be shortly.
There sometimes is nothing better than snuggling under the comforter with a good book.
So have you noticed I took the yummy man pictures down? Will you miss them? I think I just felt like ..'eh, I'm not a silly teenage girl ...just a silly almost 40 year old and there are probably other cool ways I can express my love for beautiful things. Or maybe I'll change my mind and add 'em back at some point. Or maybe I'll find some other cool or interesting things to add here.
So yeah, it's a cold night here in the city. That big snow we had today was a kick in the pants. Fucking winter. I'm just glad it was all melted by the time I left work. I HATE HATE driving in snow. I'm one of those drivers who piss the rest of you off because I'm going, like, 30 miles an hour on the freeway when the weather is bad and you wish I'd hurry the hell up or get out of your way.
I've just had my share of accidents (not all of them my fault...I think) thank you very much and would not care for any more.
Speaking of driving...it will be 10 years that I've had my license this December.
Yeah, I got my license when I was 29. It's a long story that I won't bore you with, suffice it to say, it just was finally the right time and my parent's were willing to let me have their 1973 Ford LTD. A perfect car for a person's first car wouldn't you say?
Welp, gonna wind this down and then wind me down.
Later.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Simple pleasures
My reward for surviving my Monday is to watch "Before Sunset".
Am feeling the need to watch a really really really great movie that makes me so happy and breaks my heart all at the same time.
It takes my breath away.
Reunited lovers...not just lovers, but the love of each others lives. None of this "one loving more than the other" stuff that I was subjected to by listening to 70's soft rock (but I still love 70's soft rock!) coupled with the unreality of all of those romances I've read over the years...no wonder that I have a very skewed view of love! (Whew, that was a mouthful! Run on sentence much?)
But back to the whole "love of your life" subject...I do believe in that with my whole heart..I don't necessarily believe in soul mates but I do believe that there could be someone who is the love of your life. I'm not sure what the difference really is though now that I think about it. And the funny thing is that, that is at odds with my thought/belief that there isn't only one person who is right for you and you must be with that person forever. I think people can come into your life for a certain reason and when they aren't in your life, it's not because you don't love each other, it's that you learned and experienced all you could with that person and now it's time to move on with someone else. (See what a mess I am?)
Now on to more miscellaneous notes/reflections/observations/ruminations that come to mind as I continue to watch the movie...
Just wondering if I should have started with the prequel..."Before Sunrise" ...but of course (!) the reason I want to watch this movie is to see how an unhappily married man rediscovers the love of his life and it's not the woman he's married to...and hope is given that he's finally making a choice to change his life and walk away from his current life (marriage)...
I think showing interest in someone else is really attractive.
I love that the actors wrote the screenplay w/the director and original writer.
I love that they captured the awkwardness and nervousness of their reunion...it felt real and then there is the truth and honesty that they finally expressed, to and for each other.
And of course I really love that he's gonna miss his plane.
*Sigh* if only things like this would happen in real life...
OK, enough melodrama for now. :P
Am feeling the need to watch a really really really great movie that makes me so happy and breaks my heart all at the same time.
It takes my breath away.
Reunited lovers...not just lovers, but the love of each others lives. None of this "one loving more than the other" stuff that I was subjected to by listening to 70's soft rock (but I still love 70's soft rock!) coupled with the unreality of all of those romances I've read over the years...no wonder that I have a very skewed view of love! (Whew, that was a mouthful! Run on sentence much?)
But back to the whole "love of your life" subject...I do believe in that with my whole heart..I don't necessarily believe in soul mates but I do believe that there could be someone who is the love of your life. I'm not sure what the difference really is though now that I think about it. And the funny thing is that, that is at odds with my thought/belief that there isn't only one person who is right for you and you must be with that person forever. I think people can come into your life for a certain reason and when they aren't in your life, it's not because you don't love each other, it's that you learned and experienced all you could with that person and now it's time to move on with someone else. (See what a mess I am?)
Now on to more miscellaneous notes/reflections/observations/ruminations that come to mind as I continue to watch the movie...
Just wondering if I should have started with the prequel..."Before Sunrise" ...but of course (!) the reason I want to watch this movie is to see how an unhappily married man rediscovers the love of his life and it's not the woman he's married to...and hope is given that he's finally making a choice to change his life and walk away from his current life (marriage)...
I think showing interest in someone else is really attractive.
I love that the actors wrote the screenplay w/the director and original writer.
I love that they captured the awkwardness and nervousness of their reunion...it felt real and then there is the truth and honesty that they finally expressed, to and for each other.
And of course I really love that he's gonna miss his plane.
*Sigh* if only things like this would happen in real life...
OK, enough melodrama for now. :P
Thursday, October 8, 2009
This is soooooo right on!
Leo (July 23–Aug. 22)
Here's the problem with being a fixed sign: Yeah, you sure know what you want to do with your time (unlike those vacillating Pisceans and dithering Librans), but when plans go awry, you sometimes flip your shit, and usually don't particularly enjoy yourself. Occasionally you even waste a ton of energy trying to get things to go back onto the track you'd originally imagined. However, think back to the times when you managed just to let things go: Often what happened was more exciting, interesting, and enlightening than what you'd planned. Keep that in mind the next time your train goes off the rails—it may be going somewhere good.
That's from Seattle Weekly - Sign Language.
And OMG he's hit the nail on the head...thinking back to my last days off I had fully intended to have my day(s) of staying in and keeping to myself (I've decided I like that description much better than describing it as hermit time) ...but because I didn't, I got together with Shanna & later Irma and had a good time. Every time I'm dragged kicking and screaming out, it's always fun and worth it in the end.
It won't stop me from wanting to stay in and keep to myself though... :P
Those who didn't know me when I was in my 20's wouldn't believe that back then I was a whirling dervish, flitting about from one thing to another with barely enough time to sleep. Working 3 jobs, spending time with friends and B (when we were "on" back then), going to plays, musicals, concerts, etc. I was living life to the fullest (and also not standing still long enough to realize how depressed I was and no amount of distraction would be the solution to facing up to my demons) and wringing every drop of experience I could out of life.
Hmm, ruminations on my life...I sometimes feel like I've already lived a million lifetimes in my not-quite-40-yet years. Moving, changing jobs, changing friends, relationships...
One of the many many things that therapy helped me see was that I function better with routine and consistency. That having certain things I can count on are what hold me together. That makes total sense. With a life that has changed constantly, I crave stability.
Now how all of that factors in to my need to stay in and have time for myself...I don't know but that's just where this post took me today.
Now on to other things for the time being. More later. Maybe.
Here's the problem with being a fixed sign: Yeah, you sure know what you want to do with your time (unlike those vacillating Pisceans and dithering Librans), but when plans go awry, you sometimes flip your shit, and usually don't particularly enjoy yourself. Occasionally you even waste a ton of energy trying to get things to go back onto the track you'd originally imagined. However, think back to the times when you managed just to let things go: Often what happened was more exciting, interesting, and enlightening than what you'd planned. Keep that in mind the next time your train goes off the rails—it may be going somewhere good.
That's from Seattle Weekly - Sign Language.
And OMG he's hit the nail on the head...thinking back to my last days off I had fully intended to have my day(s) of staying in and keeping to myself (I've decided I like that description much better than describing it as hermit time) ...but because I didn't, I got together with Shanna & later Irma and had a good time. Every time I'm dragged kicking and screaming out, it's always fun and worth it in the end.
It won't stop me from wanting to stay in and keep to myself though... :P
Those who didn't know me when I was in my 20's wouldn't believe that back then I was a whirling dervish, flitting about from one thing to another with barely enough time to sleep. Working 3 jobs, spending time with friends and B (when we were "on" back then), going to plays, musicals, concerts, etc. I was living life to the fullest (and also not standing still long enough to realize how depressed I was and no amount of distraction would be the solution to facing up to my demons) and wringing every drop of experience I could out of life.
Hmm, ruminations on my life...I sometimes feel like I've already lived a million lifetimes in my not-quite-40-yet years. Moving, changing jobs, changing friends, relationships...
One of the many many things that therapy helped me see was that I function better with routine and consistency. That having certain things I can count on are what hold me together. That makes total sense. With a life that has changed constantly, I crave stability.
Now how all of that factors in to my need to stay in and have time for myself...I don't know but that's just where this post took me today.
Now on to other things for the time being. More later. Maybe.
My main goal for first day off is...
Sleep. Nothin' but sleep...
Oh, OK, so maybe I'll scoop out the cat box again and do another load of laundry but that is IT!
I'm so happy to be free of work for 2 whole lovely days.
2 days free of whining, helplessness, putting-on-a-smiling-face...not to mention the crap I have to deal with the people calling! :P
I can tell it's been an even more than normal exhausting 8 days because I actually went to bed AND fell asleep before 3 a.m. last night!
So this is all for now.
ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Oh, OK, so maybe I'll scoop out the cat box again and do another load of laundry but that is IT!
I'm so happy to be free of work for 2 whole lovely days.
2 days free of whining, helplessness, putting-on-a-smiling-face...not to mention the crap I have to deal with the people calling! :P
I can tell it's been an even more than normal exhausting 8 days because I actually went to bed AND fell asleep before 3 a.m. last night!
So this is all for now.
ZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Monday, October 5, 2009
5 Down, 3 to Go.
Today sucked ass. I am having a love/hate relationship with the new system. The hate is mostly 'cause I'm not more proficient on it yet (give myself a break right? It's only been a couple of weeks...)
Plus, today I was worried about my girl, Shanna. She is in the middle, of the end, of her recent adventure and I feel so helpless. I hope it ends as soon as we hope. She is on a buddy pass and there is always an element of risk because it's standby. I just never thought it would be as bad as it has been for her. (OK, I guess I'm not making it look all that attractive a thing to take advantage of, this benefit from work of mine, but I swear it works out fine most of the time!)
Plus, I'm not going to even pick her up from the airport because now she will probably (hopefully!!!!!!!) be arriving in the morning, early morning and I don't do mornings...unless it's for sex. ;) :P
Fuck. I'm tired. I'm used to 5 days on, 2 off so it feels like it should be my weekend now but nope, I've got to push on for 3 more days.
And I'm worried about not hearing from a certain friend of mine. I think I really messed up and I didn't mean to (I do NOT crave drama for anyone else other than myself.) The whole thing is out of control and I wish I had never gotten into the position that I'm in.
Things like that are why sometimes it feels safer to just stay home and keep to myself. I can't hurt others (let alone myself) ...then again, I can't even get away from doing dumb things at work. Urgh. Not even going to get into it...let's just say you have to be careful who you jokingly call "your bitch". I was making a fucking joke and it got blown out of proportion. Fucking, fuck, fuck. (Have I not learned my lesson about making inappropriate jokes/saying inappropriate things at work in jest? That's part of what got me fired from the job I had working at a credit union a few years ago...(we were in the break room talking about bras (I didn't start it!) and I jokingly offered to just lift up my shirt and show them the one I was wearing...) Uh, yeah, I know)
Oh well, what can I do? Just learn more lessons.
I suppose I ought to wrap this up now and prepare for sleep.
Later 'gator.
Plus, today I was worried about my girl, Shanna. She is in the middle, of the end, of her recent adventure and I feel so helpless. I hope it ends as soon as we hope. She is on a buddy pass and there is always an element of risk because it's standby. I just never thought it would be as bad as it has been for her. (OK, I guess I'm not making it look all that attractive a thing to take advantage of, this benefit from work of mine, but I swear it works out fine most of the time!)
Plus, I'm not going to even pick her up from the airport because now she will probably (hopefully!!!!!!!) be arriving in the morning, early morning and I don't do mornings...unless it's for sex. ;) :P
Fuck. I'm tired. I'm used to 5 days on, 2 off so it feels like it should be my weekend now but nope, I've got to push on for 3 more days.
And I'm worried about not hearing from a certain friend of mine. I think I really messed up and I didn't mean to (I do NOT crave drama for anyone else other than myself.) The whole thing is out of control and I wish I had never gotten into the position that I'm in.
Things like that are why sometimes it feels safer to just stay home and keep to myself. I can't hurt others (let alone myself) ...then again, I can't even get away from doing dumb things at work. Urgh. Not even going to get into it...let's just say you have to be careful who you jokingly call "your bitch". I was making a fucking joke and it got blown out of proportion. Fucking, fuck, fuck. (Have I not learned my lesson about making inappropriate jokes/saying inappropriate things at work in jest? That's part of what got me fired from the job I had working at a credit union a few years ago...(we were in the break room talking about bras (I didn't start it!) and I jokingly offered to just lift up my shirt and show them the one I was wearing...) Uh, yeah, I know)
Oh well, what can I do? Just learn more lessons.
I suppose I ought to wrap this up now and prepare for sleep.
Later 'gator.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Kickin' Asses and Taking Names
Got off of work early tonight. Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet. Then again it is a Saturday night and apparently people had better things to do than call us.
So I'm home earlier than usual and I feel like getting shit done. My to-do list for the evening;
-laundry
-switch out the summer clothes for the winter clothes :(
-scoop out the cat box
-take out bedroom garbage
-pick up items in room that don't belong and put away
-straighten up my shelf in the bathroom
and of course catch up on a couple of TV shows in between. (As motivation and reward)
I am frickin' superwoman. I've accomplished a lot since I typed the above:
*doing a load of laundry (currently in the dryer!)
*took garbage out
*scooped the cat box (Fresh Step scooping cat litter really rocks and I'm beyond caring that it's probably nothing but evil ingredients)
*cooked pork chops and mashed potatoes (so now have eaten dinner and created meals to go with the leftovers)
*picked up crap off the dresser that belong in the bathroom AND tidied up my shelf in there
Whew! I'm pooped.
Now going to reward myself w/latest episode of "Fringe". After I get done watching that, then I'll do one more big thing tonight...switch out the summer/winter clothes (didn't make sense to do it before I did the laundry -of which 1/2 are summer and can be packed away) ...
Later.
Ooooh. Just got done w/"Fringe" -Wow!
Time to go clean up cat puke, wash hands and go down and get the laundry out of the dryer.
Whew again! I feel like I need another shower. Looking at all those sweaters made me hot. And I've realized that I'm lacking in long sleeved t-shirts...and I think I should get a pair of capri type leggings to wear under my skirts for the winter -or long johns...and I'll eventually have to do something about boots won't I?
But I'm done! My to-do list for tonight is complete. Yahoo! Woot woot!
Now, "Supernatural" here I come.
So I'm home earlier than usual and I feel like getting shit done. My to-do list for the evening;
-laundry
-switch out the summer clothes for the winter clothes :(
-scoop out the cat box
-take out bedroom garbage
-pick up items in room that don't belong and put away
-straighten up my shelf in the bathroom
and of course catch up on a couple of TV shows in between. (As motivation and reward)
I am frickin' superwoman. I've accomplished a lot since I typed the above:
*doing a load of laundry (currently in the dryer!)
*took garbage out
*scooped the cat box (Fresh Step scooping cat litter really rocks and I'm beyond caring that it's probably nothing but evil ingredients)
*cooked pork chops and mashed potatoes (so now have eaten dinner and created meals to go with the leftovers)
*picked up crap off the dresser that belong in the bathroom AND tidied up my shelf in there
Whew! I'm pooped.
Now going to reward myself w/latest episode of "Fringe". After I get done watching that, then I'll do one more big thing tonight...switch out the summer/winter clothes (didn't make sense to do it before I did the laundry -of which 1/2 are summer and can be packed away) ...
Later.
Ooooh. Just got done w/"Fringe" -Wow!
Time to go clean up cat puke, wash hands and go down and get the laundry out of the dryer.
Whew again! I feel like I need another shower. Looking at all those sweaters made me hot. And I've realized that I'm lacking in long sleeved t-shirts...and I think I should get a pair of capri type leggings to wear under my skirts for the winter -or long johns...and I'll eventually have to do something about boots won't I?
But I'm done! My to-do list for tonight is complete. Yahoo! Woot woot!
Now, "Supernatural" here I come.
Random S^*t!
I've been indulging in getting groceries delivered from Coborns the past couple of months and with winter approaching...well, they'll really be getting the business from this chick. They don't have everything I need/want/get from the grocery store but they have a lot and the prices are comparable! And I can live with a delivery charge. I recently learned Lund's delivers now too so maybe I'll try that sometime...we'll see.
Moving on...
"Glee" - Kristin Chenoweth singing! - Goosebumps! But the difference between her speaking voice and her singing voice just blows my mind.
A few years ago I was interested in checking out the "Just for Fun" singers "class" I saw in the St. Paul Community Ed catalog. I think "Glee" is awakening my desire to find and join them or some other group like that. I'm not interested in a church choir but more of a chorus ...that will sing a variety of material like they do on this show.
I wouldn't be looking to be a "star", I just want to be with other people and singing for the pure joy of it.
OK, so I stepped away for a moment to go find out about the Just For Fun singers and I would seriously consider signing up right now but they meet on Monday nights and of course right now I work Monday nights. :(
I did some further research though and there aren't really any other chorus groups that I would a. have any interest in joining or b. would be good enough for because they're looking for more professional singers and/or you have to audition.
Maybe when we re-bid again for shifts in February I'll aim for a Sunday/Monday as my days off.
So the other day I remembered that during this month it will be 6 years that B and I have been back together. I think it's the longest we've been "on" throughout the 15 years or so (I've lost count) we've been in this on-again/off-again relationship. And for the most part, it's been so much better this time, in spite of his other life.
OK, well it's almost 4am now and I guess I should think about crashing.
3 down and 5 to go.
Moving on...
"Glee" - Kristin Chenoweth singing! - Goosebumps! But the difference between her speaking voice and her singing voice just blows my mind.
A few years ago I was interested in checking out the "Just for Fun" singers "class" I saw in the St. Paul Community Ed catalog. I think "Glee" is awakening my desire to find and join them or some other group like that. I'm not interested in a church choir but more of a chorus ...that will sing a variety of material like they do on this show.
I wouldn't be looking to be a "star", I just want to be with other people and singing for the pure joy of it.
OK, so I stepped away for a moment to go find out about the Just For Fun singers and I would seriously consider signing up right now but they meet on Monday nights and of course right now I work Monday nights. :(
I did some further research though and there aren't really any other chorus groups that I would a. have any interest in joining or b. would be good enough for because they're looking for more professional singers and/or you have to audition.
Maybe when we re-bid again for shifts in February I'll aim for a Sunday/Monday as my days off.
So the other day I remembered that during this month it will be 6 years that B and I have been back together. I think it's the longest we've been "on" throughout the 15 years or so (I've lost count) we've been in this on-again/off-again relationship. And for the most part, it's been so much better this time, in spite of his other life.
OK, well it's almost 4am now and I guess I should think about crashing.
3 down and 5 to go.
Friday, October 2, 2009
Short but sweet
"Eastwick" is a new favorite! I didn't want to like it because of Rebecca Romijn but was willing to give it a try because of Lindsay Price (oh how I miss "Lipstick Jungle"...at least we got mostly a "happy" ending in the season/series finale) ...not that I have anything against former models...OK, maybe I do...but just a wee bit. Anyhoo...she and the entire cast are really good! They are staying consistent so far and keeping the stories moving along nicely while remembering details correctly. (This opinion is from what I've seen so far in the pilot and the just watched 2nd episode, not on the book, which I've never read (should add to my reading list?) nor the movie which I haven't seen in years.) Questions are answered and more asked and I can't wait to see what happens next. People...[critics] have been saying it's just another "Desperate Housewives" but with witchcraft, but I strongly disagree with that. I may have liked DH (in the beginning anyway, I gave it up after the end of season 2) but not as much as I'm liking "Eastwick".
So I've also decided to put off "The Good Wife", "The Forgotten", "Melrose Place", and "Three Rivers" as well as the aforementioned "Dollhouse", for later. The only other new show I'm going to keep watching for the time being is "Cougar Town".
So with my other "must-see's" this brings my count down to 14! Yippee!
So I've also decided to put off "The Good Wife", "The Forgotten", "Melrose Place", and "Three Rivers" as well as the aforementioned "Dollhouse", for later. The only other new show I'm going to keep watching for the time being is "Cougar Town".
So with my other "must-see's" this brings my count down to 14! Yippee!
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Eh. Miscellaneous.
One of my favorite bloggers wrote something that I'm going to (once again) copy/paste because I soooooo hear her loud and clear...aka she said what I keep trying to say, but more succinctly.
"Do I want to go back to school? Maybe, but I think it's more of an escapist thought than a career plan. I want the learning but not the work. I think." (Beth/Sum of Me blog.)
Uh huh. Yup. I hear you girlfriend! But let's not really talk about that tonight.
----
Hmm, mounds of laundry staring me in the face. Just can't get motivated to do it. As long as I have some clean underwear, I think I'll just keep putting it off.
So proud of myself. So back in ...May? I put the air-conditioner in, and then the other day I finally took it back out (I was freezing my ta-ta's off (oh how I wish I could really freeze them off or at least a little bit of them! :P ) and it was time :( ) Now really having to face the reality of approaching fall and winter. Blech. I'm so bummed that I can't really wear the flip-flops anymore. (I'm not one of the crazies who will wear them until the first snow) I've also now got to make some time to change out the summer clothes for the fall/winter ones. Sweaters, jackets and socks/shoes (oh my!) :(
Speaking of shoes....I need some different ones. I've got like, 5 pair (excluding my flip-flops) and they all leave something to be desired.
Sadly, my feet are like little small square Fred Flintstone feet. If I want to be lazy and cheap (like I was oh so many many many years ago) I will just make size 7 1/2's work for me...but after years of selling shoes and knowing my proper size ..well, I just can't settle for anything less than 6 1/2 WW (technically I really could go with a 6 WWW/wwww but those are even harder to find than the 6 1/2 ww's)...(man oh man, nothing about me is normal sized. I just can't catch a break ..cue the violins people!)
So in the meantime, I've got the following:
1. Black clunky mary-janes with velcro closures that have a nasty habit of coming "un-stuck" at the worst times.
2. Brownish/burgundy slip-on's that are actually OK but I wear them practically every day and they don't always go with what I'm wearing. They're so ugly they're almost cute. Almost.
3. Black flats -well, these are cute but the soles are not very thick and I dread the day I get a hole in the bottom. I've already had them fixed once and not sure they'd survive another fix.
4. Black fisherman type "sandals" ..they really only work spring/summer/fall ...they're OK but nothing special
5. Black low heels,...actually these also cute but they're pretty beat up and really should be replaced. Actually, if I could find them again, I'd buy another pair ...but I doubt I will 'cause I've had them for years...
I also need new winter boots. Mine suck. My instep is so frickin' high that I can't even zip the damn things up and they're uncomfortable to boot (ha ha ha you saw that pun comin' right? :P)
I did recently splurge (well, it wasn't a total splurge, they were on sale for $29.99 when I usually have to pay over $50) on a pair from Easy Spirit and the bastards sent me the wrong size! I doubt the proper size is gonna fit but I was, am willing to try. They're black (gee, big surprise) and I want to be optimistic about them because they're a combination of a. black b. dressy enough for skirts and dresses c. casual enough for casual outfits d. look easy enough to slip on and off (which comes in handy at airports) and e. are fairly fashionable. (FYI: The last one is the toughest requirement I had (have) in my search because wide wide sizes are usually U G L Y.) If you're curious about 'em, check 'em out at http://www.easyspirit.com/Nidi /604994108416,default,pd.html# Cute 'eh?
So now I've got to get my butt to a store to return them (running the risk they don't carry them in the store and/or in my size) or drag my butt to a post office and send 'em back and hope the correct size ..when I finally get them, actually do indeed fit. I ask you, is it so wrong to want shoes to just feel comfortable right away. Is it wrong to want them to feel like slippers?
------
So I had a fun "weekend". S and I impulsively got together Monday afternoon (crazily enough we both were free of other obligations that night) and had ourselves a bit of an adventure. She was depressed and stressed about some recent shit in her life and felt the need for some escape from the daily grind. (Lemme tell ya, it was reeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaalllly tough convincing me to leave the house (aka put on a bra) on my first day off in over a week, but the payoff was going to be worth it.) It included driving around my not-so-great neighborhood (no offense Jen), avoiding ex-boyfriends, picking up Chipotle for dinner and munchies for later in the evening, lots and lots of laughter and "brilliant" thoughts and ideas. Take from that what you will and I'm sure you'll know what I'm talkin' about. I joined us later for the winding down part of the night. (Note to I: next time you will be included from the start, won't spring the plan on you so last minute like that) ..it was a blast.
Then Tuesday was my slothful day. Well, until about midnight that is. S decided to have another adventure and I aided and abetted her. It's not for me to share but let's just say that something in my life was helpful to her.
----
Caught pilot/series premier of "Eastwick" the other night. I like it. Will go back for more and not worry so much about how well it follows the book or movie. I'm gonna "let it go" and just enjoy. And I mentioned I like "Cougar Town" right? Am going to trade the new "Melrose Place" for 'em (and then maybe catch up on MP later...)
Anyhoo, back to work today and now let the countdown begin. 1 day down, 7 to go.
"Do I want to go back to school? Maybe, but I think it's more of an escapist thought than a career plan. I want the learning but not the work. I think." (Beth/Sum of Me blog.)
Uh huh. Yup. I hear you girlfriend! But let's not really talk about that tonight.
----
Hmm, mounds of laundry staring me in the face. Just can't get motivated to do it. As long as I have some clean underwear, I think I'll just keep putting it off.
So proud of myself. So back in ...May? I put the air-conditioner in, and then the other day I finally took it back out (I was freezing my ta-ta's off (oh how I wish I could really freeze them off or at least a little bit of them! :P ) and it was time :( ) Now really having to face the reality of approaching fall and winter. Blech. I'm so bummed that I can't really wear the flip-flops anymore. (I'm not one of the crazies who will wear them until the first snow) I've also now got to make some time to change out the summer clothes for the fall/winter ones. Sweaters, jackets and socks/shoes (oh my!) :(
Speaking of shoes....I need some different ones. I've got like, 5 pair (excluding my flip-flops) and they all leave something to be desired.
Sadly, my feet are like little small square Fred Flintstone feet. If I want to be lazy and cheap (like I was oh so many many many years ago) I will just make size 7 1/2's work for me...but after years of selling shoes and knowing my proper size ..well, I just can't settle for anything less than 6 1/2 WW (technically I really could go with a 6 WWW/wwww but those are even harder to find than the 6 1/2 ww's)...(man oh man, nothing about me is normal sized. I just can't catch a break ..cue the violins people!)
So in the meantime, I've got the following:
1. Black clunky mary-janes with velcro closures that have a nasty habit of coming "un-stuck" at the worst times.
2. Brownish/burgundy slip-on's that are actually OK but I wear them practically every day and they don't always go with what I'm wearing. They're so ugly they're almost cute. Almost.
3. Black flats -well, these are cute but the soles are not very thick and I dread the day I get a hole in the bottom. I've already had them fixed once and not sure they'd survive another fix.
4. Black fisherman type "sandals" ..they really only work spring/summer/fall ...they're OK but nothing special
5. Black low heels,...actually these also cute but they're pretty beat up and really should be replaced. Actually, if I could find them again, I'd buy another pair ...but I doubt I will 'cause I've had them for years...
I also need new winter boots. Mine suck. My instep is so frickin' high that I can't even zip the damn things up and they're uncomfortable to boot (ha ha ha you saw that pun comin' right? :P)
I did recently splurge (well, it wasn't a total splurge, they were on sale for $29.99 when I usually have to pay over $50) on a pair from Easy Spirit and the bastards sent me the wrong size! I doubt the proper size is gonna fit but I was, am willing to try. They're black (gee, big surprise) and I want to be optimistic about them because they're a combination of a. black b. dressy enough for skirts and dresses c. casual enough for casual outfits d. look easy enough to slip on and off (which comes in handy at airports) and e. are fairly fashionable. (FYI: The last one is the toughest requirement I had (have) in my search because wide wide sizes are usually U G L Y.) If you're curious about 'em, check 'em out at http://www.easyspirit.com/Nidi /604994108416,default,pd.html# Cute 'eh?
------
So I had a fun "weekend". S and I impulsively got together Monday afternoon (crazily enough we both were free of other obligations that night) and had ourselves a bit of an adventure. She was depressed and stressed about some recent shit in her life and felt the need for some escape from the daily grind. (Lemme tell ya, it was reeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaalllly tough convincing me to leave the house (aka put on a bra) on my first day off in over a week, but the payoff was going to be worth it.) It included driving around my not-so-great neighborhood (no offense Jen), avoiding ex-boyfriends, picking up Chipotle for dinner and munchies for later in the evening, lots and lots of laughter and "brilliant" thoughts and ideas. Take from that what you will and I'm sure you'll know what I'm talkin' about. I joined us later for the winding down part of the night. (Note to I: next time you will be included from the start, won't spring the plan on you so last minute like that) ..it was a blast.
Then Tuesday was my slothful day. Well, until about midnight that is. S decided to have another adventure and I aided and abetted her. It's not for me to share but let's just say that something in my life was helpful to her.
----
Caught pilot/series premier of "Eastwick" the other night. I like it. Will go back for more and not worry so much about how well it follows the book or movie. I'm gonna "let it go" and just enjoy. And I mentioned I like "Cougar Town" right? Am going to trade the new "Melrose Place" for 'em (and then maybe catch up on MP later...)
Anyhoo, back to work today and now let the countdown begin. 1 day down, 7 to go.
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Noire
She'll be 2 years in 2 months! Time flies!