Happy Saturday to me. Have just been being a bum as usual. Had a better "Friday" night than usual because I went over to R's after work and set him up on a buddy pass so he can go to Georgia this weekend. Afterward to Applebee's for some late night food.
I like helping people travel for cheap because of my job. Somebody's got to be benefiting from it! I guess I should be thinkin' about taking a trip soon but to where? One of the places on my list? Eh. We'll see. I have to get some more time off first, which is proving to be impossible these days with how busy we are with merger crap.
Date with my sweetie tonight. We never managed to have our morning "date" this week so we get to have a real date night instead. Works for me. Either way, I'm happy to spend time with him.
So just killin' time right now before jumping in the shower.
I guess I should make some time to catch up on some TV at some point...maybe after B leaves, I'll catch up on a couple of shows. Then I'll head over and pick R up and take him to the airport so he can catch his insanely early flight tomorrow morning. (I'm up super late anyway, so y'all just keep that in mind if you need a ride to the airport at 3/4 in the morning!)
I guess I should get around to writing the SPCO and tell them that I'm quitting. I'm dithering about though, trying to think of what to say but I suppose it really doesn't have to be that complicated does it? It's just the right time and for the best I think. All I feel is resentful for going over there and with winter approaching...the hassles of parking are just not worth it. There are better things I can do with my time on my days off...such as see my friends more...right? Right!
Still it will be the end of a chapter that has lasted for 5 years. I had lost my job with USFCU and was moving back to St. Paul and the job with them came along at the right time. It was the perfect job for me at the time because I needed a place where I felt confident and safe...getting back into arts ticketing was like putting on a favorite sweater. So I did it and worked only for them for a couple of years, then went off and had my experience with the opera (while yet, still officially working for the SPCO having not given notice) and then after that ended, went back to work for SPCO with my tail tucked between my legs. Then knowing I really needed constant, steady full-time employment, found the job with the airline. (How hard could airline ticketing be since I'd already done arts ticketing for YEARS? Ha ha...little did I know it would be one of the ..hardest? ...jobs I'd ever have!)
I'm sad that my working there never led to a position of full-time work because I really really love(d) arts ticketing. Sadly, between a couple of incidents of losing my temper and my proclaiming my intent to move to England, I lost out on the chance to get a couple of full-time jobs that I applied for...well, I'm pretty sure those were the main factors why I didn't get them. Then again, in all of the non-profit arts organizations I've worked at, there was always some reason I didn't get a full-time job that I wanted and it's a wonder why I stuck around the field so long. I wanted it so badly but kept not succeeding. (No wonder I was on fucking cloud nine when the opera finally said "yes, we want to offer you the position of Ticket Office Manager"...having worked in the ticketing for years, I was finally being rewarded for my dedication and hard work and plus I was damn good at it too!) (Yup, another reason why Beth's post really resonated with me!)
So I've had to just tuck all those dreams away because it hurt too much to keep trying for jobs I wasn't going to get. So with a variety of reasons I don't know combined with the fact that I wasn't perfect and I made some mistakes along the way has/had ruined my chances in a field that has way too small of a playing field in this town.
I think it really is time just to let that part of my life go. Move on. While it's been fun to have the coolness factor of being able to say "I work for the SPCO", it's really mostly part of my past and a reminder of where I failed. I'll focus on getting my shit together attitude-wise and see if I can't get somewhere else besides reservations at work.
Upward AND onward.
(Note: It's done. I just sent the email to the Ticket Office Mgr/Asst. Mgr giving my notice. Just one more concert to work, the day after turkey day but then I'm done!)
Musings from a big and beautiful sometimes "drama queen" on her current state of existence
What's It All About?
"The unexamined life is not worth living." Socrates
While you’re here, in this time and in this space, you are beautiful and you are perfect.
You are right where you need to be to get to where you want to go, so start asking yourself where you want to go.
Noire
She'll be 2 years in 2 months! Time flies!
Things I'm grateful for everyday....
- My family
- My friends, old and new.
- A roof over my head.
- My computer & internet access
- Being employed (even if I don't always like things about my job)
- The public library and the joy of borrowing books with/on/for my Kindle
- That I can walk on two legs, use 2 arms/hands, have ten fingers/toes, can see and hear, etc. (uh, no offense to anyone who is physically challenged)
- Other people's creativity and efforts
- The love of a good man (he IS good)
- My friends, old and new.
- A roof over my head.
- My computer & internet access
- Being employed (even if I don't always like things about my job)
- The public library and the joy of borrowing books with/on/for my Kindle
- That I can walk on two legs, use 2 arms/hands, have ten fingers/toes, can see and hear, etc. (uh, no offense to anyone who is physically challenged)
- Other people's creativity and efforts
- The love of a good man (he IS good)
Current Favorite Quotes
“Be content with what you have, rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” - Lao Tzu
"The privilege of a lifetime is to be who you are." ~ Joseph Campbell
"Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some." ~ Charles Dickens
"We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." -Carlos Castañeda
"..there’s something lovely about knowing that when it’s right, you really know it’s right because you’ve already been through all the wrong." ~ Sade
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~ Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss)
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." —Mark Twain
(This bit not so much as a quote but somethings I wrote down that I want to keep and this looks like a good place to do it)
7-25-07
1. Almost everything comes from almost nothing.
2. The best way to predict your future is to create it.
3. Leap and the net will appear.
"The privilege of a lifetime is to be who you are." ~ Joseph Campbell
"Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty; not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some." ~ Charles Dickens
"We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same." -Carlos Castañeda
"..there’s something lovely about knowing that when it’s right, you really know it’s right because you’ve already been through all the wrong." ~ Sade
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." ~ Theodor Geisel (Dr. Seuss)
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." —Mark Twain
(This bit not so much as a quote but somethings I wrote down that I want to keep and this looks like a good place to do it)
7-25-07
1. Almost everything comes from almost nothing.
2. The best way to predict your future is to create it.
3. Leap and the net will appear.
Facts of Life (per Sonya Friedman)
- 1. No one can bring your life to you
- 2. No matter what you do, someone important isn't going to like it
- 3. Though painful, rejection won't kill you - it may even lead to growth
- 4. Every choice means giving up something different
- 5. Some people aren't capable of giving you what you're trying to get from them
- 6. The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others
- 7. There are no quick fixes that can permanently change your life
- 8. Life is on a rheostat, not an on/off switch
- 9. Some problems cannot be solved - but you can make peace with them