An epiphany!

So it's been a lovely day. Went out and enjoyed the weather and got to spend time with my sweetie tonight. Now I've just finished watching the latest episodes of "Castle", "Better Off Ted", "The Unusuals" and the finale (season? series?) finale of "Scrubs" (It was all about the ABC shows tonight) ...then afterward was perusing the TV web site/pages and came across Matt Roush from TVGuide Magazine's review of the finale of "Scrubs" and was moved to write the following:

Sam Jones wrote:
Fri, May 08, 2009, 03:51 AM
I can't read this Roush review of the finale of Scrubs and take it even remotely seriously. It was a GREAT finale...felt like a true series finale yet if it does come back I'll watch it. It's had it highs and lows but the new interns bring great energy to it and I still enjoy it. Why say goodbye to an old friend just because they may not be what they were in the beginning? It's still has a lot of heart and humor and shame on you Matt for being so negative about it.

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I mean seriously! Why are people so critical and hell bent on a good show ending. So what if it isn't the same show we fell in love with ...things change. Everything changes. If we're still being entertained by these characters that we've invested years in, then why should we be so quick to kiss it goodbye? I've never understood the whole "leave the party while it's still fun" idea (e.g. what they were saying about why they were ending "Sex and the City")

I guess I get that the actors might want to not play the same characters for decades but hell, that's why they have breaks in between seasons so they can go off and do whatever, plus they won't literally play that character forever...

So as I look at those words I wrote I have to think to myself ...yeah, that's right. Like duh! Sam. People and friendships do change over time and even if you don't always see eye to eye it's no reason to give up on the relationship that you've had for years and years. I get that people can grow apart and have different lives but there has to be some way to retain those pieces of yourself that you gave to others (though I don't believe in hanging on to friendships that are all about negativity and constant pessimism...who needs to be with someone who can't find joy in any part of life?) Don't we all just want a friend who will be in that jail cell with us and not just be the one bailing us out? The kind that support us, even if our choices aren't always what they consider the wisest? The kind that are patient and forgiving as we fumble through life.

Anyway, I've just been doing a lot of thinking about old friends lately since some very significant people have come back in to my life. One who hasn't, another dear old friend, E, came to mind today because it was his birthday. I don't know if that friendship will ever get over what broke it apart. I just hope he is happy.

I want all of my friends, old and new, to be happy and to have the lives that they want for themselves. I hope that I have matured enough to express that more often and to show them that I still sincerely really want the best for them.

It's certainly been a day/night for insights.

Part of my afternoon was spent on a phone call with R, my navigator for this Stay Well, Stay Working program I've been in for the last couple of years and in that conversation I mentioned my whole treading water/swimming in place thing and she made a really good point that even when a person is doing that (she first pointed out the obvious...kudos for that 'cause it means you're keeping your head above water and staying afloat) don't discount the currents in the water that carry you along toward... whatever. They'll take you closer to where you need to go eventually.

I also mentioned to her about how I hope this is the summer that sees me enjoying the weather and being outdoors more and again it's like duh! Yeah, I should actually tell people that I want to do more active things. Why didn't I think of that? Seriously, why didn't I think about that?

You know this is what I love about talking to other people...learning new ways to think about things. Learning how other people think about things. People are fascinating, fantastic and frustrating aren't they?

Well, I'm putting myself back out there to be amongst them and the hermit days are over!