OMG OMG OMG or to be yourself is all that you can do.

So I was just going through the lists of posts (cleaning 'em up 'cause I knew there were a few unfinished drafts floating out there) and came across a comment from one of the ladies who contributes to another blog I read and I'm totally psyched that I have another reader (or had one more for a night if she only read the one post!)

You all know how thrilled I am that you read this, but you're the fabulous and friends and so I know you read me and hang on to my every word... :P (or hey, if you just skim it looking for the juicy stuff that's OK too :) ) but now I see a "stranger" has read me too! Eeeeeeeeeeeee! That's so flippin' fantastic! Well just blow me down. Kisses and hugs to everyone/anyone who reads this. My little Leo heart is SO SO happy....

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Driving home tonight from work (and how insane is it that everyone's Friday is my Monday? Oh well) and mulling over what I should "talk" about tonight and one of the thoughts was about how I had just been chatting with a friend tonight and how damn brave I think she is for grabbing some issues she's been dealing with, by the big hairy balls, and is taking back control over some stuff in her life and dealing with some shit once and for all. (It does beg the question...will that actually work? I'll have to be sure to ask her...)

Oh how I wish I had the guts to do that. But I guess we all just have to find our own ways through our crap. I know I'm a work in progress and everyday is a day full of new choices. Every day is a new day to make new choices. Every day is a new day to make new choices. Every day is a new day to make new choices. (Uh, if I tell myself this enough I'll be convinced it's true...)

Tonight I will regret the choice to stop by BK on the way home because my stomach feels icky. Over the past few months, I'd been staying away from fast food ...and then the last 2 weeks has seen me say, screw that, I'm hungry and want food NOW. And I'm not happy that I'm being so hard on myself about it but it's like I know better but didn't pay any attention to that inner voice that was telling me that I could make a better choice...(but man oh man, it's exhausting to always be trying to do the right thing, make the right choice isn't it? )

But there it is, tomorrow, a new day, and I will make the choice to NOT eat any more fast food. I got groceries so there really is no need is there? Good food too. Oranges and bananas and yogurt. Chips/salsa. Fruit snacks. Orange juice. Good stuff. And even if there is stuff that maybe isn't so "good", what I have will still be waaaaay better than fast food. And after work? There is nothing wrong with having just some crackers and cheese as a "snack" when want to eat a little something.

I WILL gain back control over the things I choose to eat/drink.

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My weekend was...could have been better, could have been worse. I did get to see my honey for a bit on Wednesday night. Then Thursday I bargained myself out of getting together w/Ryan and into seeing him after I get off work tomorrow. It really does sometimes work out better to get together w/people on a day I'm already up and out. I just really really really wanted a day at home, staying in my jammies (we all really know that is about going "undergarment" free, right? 'Cause they ALL suck one way or another) and to just be alone and not have to be "on" like I tell myself I have to be with the people calling in at work and with my friends (not that they expect me to be "on" but (and I'm going to attribute this to my sign) because this Leo feels the need to shine and sparkle when around others and I just...couldn't.

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Decided to give that new show "Justified" a try. Love it. Adding it to the "really must-see" list. I keep meaning to have a post about my current TV watching but what really is there to say except that I haven't bothered with the final season of "Nip/Tuck" yet. And I'm waiting until the end of the current season to watch "Project Runway". And that I think I've given up on "Flash Forward" because I've just had other shows higher on the list that I needed to see every week but we'll see. And at some point, I'll catch up w/"The Closer" but for now I've got my hands full w/the "real must-sees".

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I should probably call my parent's one of these days...I know my mom will be thrilled to get a call from me. I want to do better at keeping in touch with them. (Not that I should be "shoulding" all over myself...)

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I haven't bothered to get my hair cut quite yet. Maybe I'll just let it keep growing. I haven't had it long in years (or have I? Time is just whizzing on by isn't it?) and I like the way I look w/longer hair...

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So this is supposed to be my year of wild (and/or grand) adventures ...and I think I need to be thinking about the next one. I was actually thinking I hadn't had one since zipping off to San Diego for Scotty's birthday last month, but I think I'm going to consider having B, er, I mean having a date w/B, ;) in a hotel room last week as the latest one. So there. You're on track, Sam. Just keep being open to new things. Right. Right. Uh huh.

With the big "4-0" rapidly approaching, my thoughts are heading toward a meaningful, significant, BIG, wild way to celebrate and my mind is completely blank. I don't necessarily want to celebrate out of town because who could join me? Most everybody I care about is already here (and I'm flying Scotty in here or else! :P ) so why not just find something lovely to do in this town? It'll be summertime so that's a plus.

Pfffft. No need to fret about it tonight.

Well I think that's about all for now. Time to go "farmin'" and then settle down for the night.

Onward. With eyes half-shut.